Tlaib Suggests All Meat Must Be Halal

Freshman Congresswoman Rashida Tlaib has once again put her “faith” above that of everyday Americans. She has suggested that meat not prepared in the traditional Halal standards should be banned from stores and butcher shops in America.

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No more taking chances of using unclean surfaces to prepare meat. Higher safety standards for our food. Bad. All bad. Everyone knows you can’t say salmonella without saying salmon! Contaminated food surfaces is just a fancy code word for extra flavor.

As it turns out, Congresswoman Tlaib is not even seeking to get rid of foods that her religion frowns upon.

“This is America. If we were to go fully Halal, that would be a violation of everything that I hold dear. I represent more people than just those of Muslim faith. I want higher safety standards so that the people of this great land know that there are higher quality standards. I know that this is a diverse country and that there are many hunters among us, so hunted animals and wild caught fish will not be included. People, I don’t want your guns. I just want better food standards for everyone.”

In a recent poll taken by the Dunning-Kruger Institute, a full 73% of Americans polled are against this potential legislation. Art Tubolls explained:

“These people don’t even know what Halal means. They just hear it and they freak out. They didn’t even listen. I could have called each of those 73% a scalloped tater and they wouldn’t notice. I even offered to explain what Halal and how far she wants to take it but they didn’t care. All I heard was ‘deport, deport, deport. Taters gonna tate I guess.”

Art Tubolls is right. This is America and no extremism of any kind will be allowed to flourish here!

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